Allah lets me start anew :)
By of His grace, I would wake up every day, and never failed to utter my syukur. My early day prayer would sound somehow like this;
"Oh Allah... I am thankful for everything. For my heart that never fails me to put my faith in You. For my eyes in which I can see beautiful things. For my nose - I could breath the cold air every morning. For my ears that often took me away blissfully when hearing Al Quran and music. For my intellect and my ability to observe that always made me stunned and humbled in front of Your genius creation. For blessing me with such an amazing family. For the love you gave me to love. For my feelings of care towards others. For Iman, in which with it I would strive to seek to understand the wisdom of good and bad in my life. For letting me becoming a Huffaz and giving me the chance to preserve it. For letting me to become an Ummah of Prophet Muhammad SAW. For giving me the way to embrace Islam as my way of life. And most importantly, without it my life would not mean a thing, for letting You being my God, and for letting me to be your servant. Bless me and bless my life, and bless the people I love". [This prayer was inspired along the way when I read buku Kecerdasan Asma'ul Husna. The book was so thick, and I was so laaaaazzzyy to renew it at the library, I had to pay RM 6.00 fine in the end. -.-]My plan
Dulu-dulu, my mind is set to becoming a physicist. Now, I've set my aim to become an engineer. So, let me tell you my plan and you will help me by praying for me. I will finish my study and I will work for big companies like TnB. After four to five years, I would appeal to my employer to continue my master part-time, and ask my employer to sponsor my PhD. I want to do my master or PhD overseas, and I will bring my wife there. After finishing my PhD, I would to take on the 'Ir' title. After that, I plan to open up my own consultation firm. From there, I will apply to be a part-time lecturer. By entering academics arena, I will be able to do networking in academics research. Just like UPM did with Islamic University of Gaza, thanks to Dr Hafidzi. So, I plan to collaborate with Palestinians. My experience as a personal escort and interpreter for two Imam Muda Gaza last Ramadan have made realized, how much they suffer not only in terms of medicine and food, they lacked almost everything. Job opportunities to electrical power. Almost everything. And I cannot stand to let things go that way. After collaborating, I want to open up orphanage and animal care centre. Our prophet loved orphans and animals. I want to place the orphanage near Al-Amin or any MUSLEH school. So that they can attend the very special school in my heart and go through tarbiyah. And at nights, they will also be loving wardens waiting for them. Not wardens with cane and strictness, but wardens with smiles, patience, and heart. If we read Prophet Muhammad's sirah, we will realize that Prophet Muhammad had never once laid its hand on any kids. When kids came to him, he would play with them. He would hug them and cherish them. He would praise them. Rindunya Nabi :'(
And animal centre. I got three cats when I was in primary school. Kitty, Kidtun, Kittan. Kitty and Kidtun are cats with spots black and white. When I berkhatan (traditional and painful like api), I used to hang kain pelekat on top of me. People yang berkhatan traditionally would know this. During this period, those two naughty cats would jump over the kain pelekat. Macam saja-saja. Sometimes they 'accidentally' jump on the kain pelekat and on the spot and I would scream so loudly and painfully. Many times. My dad once made the decision to throw them away. My dad brought them so far from our home at night. My brother and I cried heavily. You know what happened? In the morning, when I opened the door, Kitty and Kidtun jumped on me. I was so happy. My Kittan died in a car accident. It meowed so weirdly in front of my house one day, its belly was crushed. After those three passed away, I've never had any animals in my life. I loved them. And dogs! Although I cannot touch dogs, and I love dogs and I often watched 'The Dog Whisperer', I want to hire people so that they can care for stray cats and dogs. The problem with The Dog Whisperer Cesar Milan's method in handling dogs is that they don't work for cats(Of course, the method was meant for dogs =.='). When I meet cats, I often try the techniques I learned from him to those cats. But as always, I'll end up looking like a fool trying to shh shh the cat to sit and stay. And the cats will always end up looking at me with the expression "Pehal mamat ni. Buang tebiat apa?" and go away ignoring me. Haha.
I want to start 'dapur amal' as in the US too. Few things I learned last year. There are many homeless people in Malaysia. I once slept at a bus stop near Jalan Raja Laut (my old bad habit - I tend up to wander at nights if I don't feel good and stop somewhere to sleep), an old man approached me asking for just RM2. I asked what for. He said, he was hungry. I gave him some money. If you want to know, there are a few 'dapur amal' di Malaysia. 'Dapur amal' is a food centre where people who don't have enough money to eat or just homeless can come and eat. For free. People who have never been through poverty would never understand. But we can try and be considerate. I myself never feel that poverty. I feel so pity when I see many 'pengemis' at mosque and pasar. We know ada tempat yang ada sindiket. My principle - I will help for now. Beli nasi untuk mereka, beli air. Bagi kuih untuk anak-anak mereka. Entah. I don't know. Prophet Muhammad in one story, gave a man money for him to buy an axe and find some firewood to sell. That's how we should help. But, for now, how? I don't know.
These are my aims for now.
And for that to come true, I must work hard. I think if I keep the pace as I did this semester, insyaAllah I will be there.
It's a long way to go. And it is not easy, I know. But now, I am working with a power engineer who owns a power company and at the same time a part-time lecturer. He supervised the RnD robotic team I am in. So, it is not impossible. I know.
Apa yang constant?
Dreams may change. Although mine are still not. The most important thing is, you know your true place. Why do you want to chase your dreams and how? Always keep Allah as your priority. Always.
And along the way, it can only be achieved by tarbiyah.
I choose to be in IKRAM. Each has their choices. One of my anak usrah chose to be in ISMA. He once asked me what are the differences between jemaahs? Alhamdulillah. I was taught to highlight ONLY the good of others. Not weaknesses. Although in the midst of critical analysis, we tend to open up other weaknesses, but no. We are Muslims, we don't do that. We choose to do da'wah not because we want them to join our jemaah. No. We choose to do da'wah because it is our responsibility. And we do da'wah to invite others to ISLAM. And we chose what we choose because we believe that is the best choice for us to convey Islam.
The moment my anak usrah chose to be in ISMA, yes, it disappointed me a bit. But, I must accept it. And I accepted it. The good moment came when we agreed, one day maybe when our generation led the jemaah, we may at last come to an understanding and join again as one. InsyaAllah. Or maybe not. Still, he is good with me till today. Like nothing happened.
So, regardless of our jemaah, we share the same responsibility. Either you are in PAS, tabligh, ISMA, or Haluan. We invite others to Islam, and we Islah each other. Da'wah and Islah. We have differences and SIMILARITIES. Look at our own body. Some cells bring oxygen, some cells defend the body from bad agents, some cells connect and respond. Brain decides, hand feels, foot walks, eye sees, nose smells, ear listens. Our own body is a great example of harmony. Harmony - differences are dealt effectively, and similarities dimanfaatkan optimally. We share the same goal.
Islam itu rahmah. Seluruh 'alam. Muslims and non-Muslims will feel it. If we practice Islam, truly, it will be rahmah. From the individual level where Islam shapes good persons. Good persons make happy family. Happy family makes good neighbour. Good neighbours form an understanding community. Community where religious rights are respected, understanding governs, and values uphold. Noble community demands clean and efficient administration where the demands are rooted from caring concern towards future generation and their welfare. A government where 'good governance' is applied. Muslims and non-Muslims work together to strive for a better world. A world where sensitive issues are countered with akhlaq and effective intellectual response. Think what would happen if all of Muslims behave the way we should behave.
What I wish to be the constant in my life? Tarbiyah :)
So that others, you and I may leave this world in peace. I want when my soul returns, Allah greets me as in Surah al Fajr.
(It will be said to the pious): "O (you) the one in (complete) rest and satisfaction! "Come back to your Lord, Well-pleased (yourself) and well-pleasing unto Him! "Enter you, then, among My honoured slaves, "And enter you My Paradise!"The English translation is insufficient. The verses themselves are beautiful. The arabic words used are so deep. Deeeeep... Memuncak kerinduan rasa.
Allahumma amitna bi mauti syuhada'.
All in all
1. JOM! Strive for a better life and a better world. Turn your dream into actions. Don't just sit there.
2. Baru habis seminar. Nanti kalau successfully double duit I'll share. Sekarang tak boleh lagi. Dia suruh ada bukti baru bagi tahu orang. The main speaker, successfully turn USD 1000 to 2 million USD in a year.
3. Tadi buat majlis pecah botol Ayaz. Bukan pecah berkecai macam tu. Cuma, just nak rasmikan pada ayaz lepas ni tak guna botol dah. "No bottles are harmed". Selepas ni Ayaz tak minum susu guna botol dah. Abang-abang kat rumah semua menjerit "Yes! Zaman kegelapan dah berakhir! Kezaliman botol susu dah berakhir!". Although ada lagi sorang maharaja botol susu - yang paling kecik Saif. [Kelihatan Saif gelak jahat sorang-sorang di sudut ruang tamu].
4. Malam ini pergi ini pulak.